


I can’t be trapped again

by Nadiahilkerfan



Series: Two Kane sisters in one house [1]
Category: Batwoman (TV 2019)
Genre: Alice and Kate centric, Alice angst, Alice my little traumatized bean, So much angst in this, episode 15, finally Kate admits she still care for her sister, finally someone gives her a hug, off with her head
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-16
Updated: 2020-03-17
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:56:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23168128
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nadiahilkerfan/pseuds/Nadiahilkerfan
Summary: Picking up right after, Batwoman episode 15, Off with your head. Alice now just kinda lives with Kate.And Kate finally seems to truly understand that Alice is traumatized. As she screams in her sleep. And never removes her fingerless gloves. And tiny little things set her off into uncontrollable shaking.Basically, Alice finally gets recognized and the receives the comfort she’s been deprived of for so long.
Relationships: Beth Kane | Alice & Kate Kane
Series: Two Kane sisters in one house [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1668538
Comments: 20
Kudos: 97





	1. She screams in her sleep

**Author's Note:**

> Yo this is a three part series, but if u really don’t like it. I won’t continue 
> 
> Just rushed this out super late for us
> 
> ALSO
> 
> FEEL FREE TOO COMMENT GUYS
> 
> I WELCOME IT ACTUALLY 
> 
> AND SUPPORT IT
> 
> I WANT UR FEEDBACK AND LOVE AND CRITICISM!

She screams in her sleep.

She screams in her sleep, is one of the first things Kate marks down as what makes Alice, Alice. 

She’s disappointed that she doesn’t even think of her as Beth anymore. But now knowing a little bit more of what happened to her those horrible years. Kate starts to understand why.

Still,

It’s the middle of the night, Kate is desperately trying to sleep. Trying to forget burying a body she killed. While Alice watched with a fury so deep and burning. Her lips turned upwards into one of her haunting smiles.

She’s trying to sleep. But she can’t with the screaming. Alice is in the guest bedroom of Kate’s house. Her door locked so she can’t escape. Bars attached over her window so she can’t break the glass.

It was around 12:00 when Kate first heard it.

It came abruptly, loud and shrill. Jolting her out of a restless slumber. Her Heart skipping beats as she got tangled in her sheets. Gripping for whatever she could find. For something to hold on too. 

She momentarily panicked, thinking someone was dying. But upon listening to the familiar scream, she came to the conclusion that someone was indeed dying. Just mentally.

“I THOUGHT YOU WANTED IT SWEET! I THOUGHT YOU WANTED IT SWEET!” Alice shouted in her sleep. 

Kate winced, even though the words were odd. And gritted her teeth as she heard her sister scream and sob unconsciously.

“No, no NO! I DID WHAT YOU WANTED! I made it bitter! I made it BITTER!” She continued. Kate tried to ignore it. Feeling so conflicted on what to do.

“No, no please no, please no I made it bitter WHY!!!” She cried, her voice echoing down the hall.

Kate jumped to her feet. Not knowing what to do. But instinctively moving towards the room where she lay.

She paused when the cries slowed down. Seemingly coming to a stop. 

The masked vigilante contemplated whether to continue. When the screams came back twice as loud.

“I LIKE MY HAIR! STOP! YOU ALREADY CUT IT SHORT. STOP IT STOP IT STOP! “ she yelled her voice hoarse. And then continued on.

The shorter haired girl shook her head as she tiptoed closer to the door. 

I thought you wanted it sweet? 

I made it bitter?

I like my hair?!?

Kate wanted to ask what the hell happened to make her scream those at night, when she heard words that made her stomach drop.

“KATE! No! No no no no, don’t leave. Don’t leave Kate. Come back. Please! KATE DONT LEAVE ME HEAR! SHE HATES ME! KATE SHE HATES ME DONT LEAVE ME HERE!” 

Screw it. Kate ran the rest of the way. Busting the door open. 

She flinched when she saw her sister. 

Tangled up in the sweat soaked sheets.   
Gloved mysteriously still on. Eyes drilled closed, but tears streaming down her face in heavy rivers. Her back arcing up and down. As she fought restlessly with the demons that haunted her.

“KATE,” she sobbed, “COME BACK!” 

“Beth!” Kate tried.

“Beth wake up!” 

The blonde girl did not hear her. Too caught in the monsters that clawed at her. 

She abruptly went quiet again, sobbing hysterically to herself. 

And Kate took this to her advantage, climbing onto the bed, she tried shaking her awake.

“Beth, wake up. I’m here now.” She tried one again to no avail. Alice started muttering stuff to herself.

“I brought the cream your majesty. I brought the cream!” She repeated. And for about five bleary seconds, Kate wondered if she was having some weird sex dream, 

NO?!? Why would she even think that! Ugh. Stupid Alice, that’s probably something she’d say with passion when she was awake!

“No no nononono.” Alice started to build tempo.

Kate started to get desperate. She needed Alice to wake up.

“No their has to be cream no!”

She needed her awake.

“Cream, Mom! Nononono mom. NO!”

Kate heart felt like it was physically ripping out of her chest, when she heard her sister in pain.

“Mom, cream, palms up, tea, bitter, sweet, I like my hair.” Alice started to blend. Growing more and more erratic her arms flailing and almost Hitting Kate in the face like twenty times.

Kate grabbed the flying limbs and pinned them to her chest. She leaned downward on her torso, trying to pin her down while unsuccessfully waking up.

“Palms up, tea, bittersweet, bittersweet palms up, colored my hair, cream, cream. Mom!” Alice rushes out. The words blending till they became one word in unison.

Something clicked in Kate’s brain.

“ALICE KANE. WAKE UP!” She screamed. 

Alices eyes bursted open. Her body spasmed, as she instinctively started to fight the body on top of her.

“No no, it’s just me, Alice it’s just me! It’s Kate!” She was quick to explain.

She took in the girls panicked eyes. Filled with a fear so deep, even though she just heard it, it shocked her.

“K-k-Kate??” Alice questioned desperately. As if she still thought she was dreaming. Her hands shaking violently from were Kate had clasped them in her own.

“Ya, Al, it’s me. It’s me. I’m here. Your ok.” The girl was quick to soothe. Acting on instinct, she pulled the girl close. 

Alice tensed, but soon buried herself almost painfully into her embrace. Crying hysterically.

“I th-thought she wanted it sweet. I thought sh-she w-wanted it sweet.” She cried into Kate’s chest. 

“Shhh, it’s ok now. Their both dead. They can’t hurt you anymore.” Kate soothed. Rubbing a hand up and down the girls back while it heaved. The other tightly grasped around Alices waist.

She continued to do so while Alice cried. Letting out broken phrases here and their. Leaving the Lesbian much more angrier at her tormentors, but yet so confused.

This was the psychopath who killed people without a second thought?

No. 

This was the girl who was put through unimaginable horrors.

Eventually. Alice cried herself back to sleep. Which didn’t really do much. The tears still flowed then. 

But, the screaming had stopped. And Alice seemed content buried in her sisters comforting arms.

And Kate was happy to lend them.

She definitely marked this down in her brains.

Alice, things that she does that were caused by her trauma.

1\. She screams in her sleep.


	2. She never takes her gloves off

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the morning after the nightmares, Kate is confused on what to do.
> 
> She has a serial killer in her kitchen.
> 
> Um. 
> 
> Maybe this wasn’t a good idea?
> 
> Anyway. She says something she shouldn’t and another piece of Alices dark past comes to light!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YO I PUT A RUSH ON THIS NEXT CHAPTER FOR YOU ALL! I HOPE YOU LIKE IT! 
> 
> ALSO FOLLOW ME ON TUMBLR 
> 
> @Mr-walkingrainbow
> 
> I posted 2 Alice edits from last night I think you would like!!!

She never removes her fingerless gloves.

Is the second thing Kate realizes, more like notices, once Alice starts living with her. 

It wasn’t even purposeful. 

The morning after the hell that was last night was cheerful. Almost mockingly so.

Alice sat at the table, her one hand tapping a strange rhythm Kate would never pick up on, and the other seemingly glued to her lips. As her teeth bit down on painted nails over and over.

Her eyes twitched, as dark bags lay underneath them. And Kate wondered how long had they been their.

Was it just appearing ? Or just another thing she had missed and overlooked in her somewhat foolish mission to pretend she didn’t care.

Honestly, she didn’t know what to do now.

She had a psychological serial killer in her house, her, Kate Kane, aka Batwoman. Had no other then Alice.

“So Beth-um Alice,” Kate corrected ,”do you want some breakfast or something?” 

Alice jerked her head, peering at her with owlish eyes

“Well sometimes I’ve believed as many as Six impossible things before Breakfast!” She chanted rhythmically.

Kate rolled her eyes and gripped the countertop tightly. Her eyes darted to the copy of Alice and Wonderland placed under the lip of the bar. She’d been meaning to read up on it. Maybe she could decipher some of the odd things her sister said.

“Uh, I could make you some coffee,” she tried again, seeing Alice quirk an eyebrow in response ,”Um, would you prefer tea?”

The question seemed to have an opposite effect on the girl.

“BITTERSWEET!” She shrieked. Holding a hand over her mouth a moment too late. 

Her pale complexion drained of any and all color. 

And that was when Kate noticed the gloves.

Momentarily distracted, she glanced at them curiously. She’d never noticed them to much. Thinking back, she’d realized she’d never seen Alice without them. 

“I thought you wanted it sweet. I thought you wanted it sweet.” Alice repeated over and over again. Causing Kate to snap out of whatever she was thinking.

“Alice!” She called out.

“I’m sorry I thought you wanted it sweet, please I thought you wanted it sweet.” Alice continued. Her hands clenched tightly to her chest. Her head shook as she obviously saw something that wasn’t their.

Kate stepped right in front of her, trying to block her sight.

“Alice snap out of it!” She tried again. Dad had told her that the while the adrenaline had been injected, the Toxin would still take some time to completely leave her system. And she would be prone to hallucinations.

“N-no please. No. I thought you wanted it sweet.” Alice whimpered. Kate could only stare helplessly as the later Flinched.

The blonde, squeezed her eyes shut. And slowly but shakily held her hands out in front of her.

Prompting confusion from the brown haired girl. Her brow furrowed as she stared at them. What did Alice want her to do? The black paint was evadible, the thin frail fingers trembling.

Alice spasmed once again. Causing Kate to panic. What was happening??? What was she seeing???

“I’m sorry.” Alice meekly whispered. Before hesitantly turning her palms face up.

*Palms up* 

Ghosted through Kate’s head. That was something she screamed last night. Along with, I thought you wanted it sweet.

So this had to do something with Tea?

She watched in horror as Alice started screaming her head off, her arms quivering as she yanked her hands back, folding them over again protectively against her chest. 

Kate knew this needed to stop.

She grabbed Alice by the shoulders and shook her lightly.

“ALICE! It’s just me! It’s Kate!” She repeated.

“Kate! It BURNS! It BURNS KATE IT BURNS!” Alice sobbed. Kate scanned her eyes, and finally it seemed to click.

The tea. Whoever she made it for. She wanted it bitter. Alice made it sweet.

*i thought you wanted it sweet!*

She didn’t like it sweet. 

*i thought you wanted it sweet!*

She made her hold her hands out.

*im sorry!*

She made her hold them palms facing upwards.

*palms up!*

And then, Kate guessed with horror, all the pieces falling into place, she took the tea, and poured the scalding liquid all over her frail hands.

“IT BURNS!” Alice screamed once again. 

Kate gasped in understanding. 

Running to the sink, she grabbed a bowl and filled it with ice water.

Quickly bringing it back, she place it on the table, grabbed Alices hands, and plunged them in the freezing liquid.

Alice squeaked. But said nothing else. Her eyes remained shut. And her body trembled violently.

Kate wrapped her arms around her sisters shoulder, and pulled her against her. Rocking back and forth ever so slightly.

“Shhh, it’s ok. She’s not here. Your hands are fine. Their not burnt.” She soothed.

Alice nodded repeatedly. Trying to blink away the hallucination.

“W-were here. Sh-She’s not their! My hands are protected.” She whispered to herself. Trying to clear her brain.

That’s when Kate remember the gloves Alice always wore. And came to the conclusion on why she wore them.

It was part of her trauma. She’d never leave her hands uncovered ever again. 

It was then Kate was stuck with a horrible thought. 

How bad did she burn her?

...were their scars??? Is that another reason she kept the gloves on? To hide the scars that were still their??

“S-she burned me,” Alice spoke clearly, startling Kate slightly. 

“W-with the tea. She burned me. She wanted it bitter. I thought she wanted it sweet.” She choked out, looking so vulnerable. Kate barely got to see this side to her. She’d only truly seen it last night.

“I know.” She agreed. Bracing Alice with her hands.

“I know. I’m here for you. I’m not gonna leave you till your ok.” She stated.

Alice chuckled, letting out a few of those maniacal laughs Kate hated.

“Oh Kate! I’ll never be ok!” She cackled. 

A mixture of laughter and tears swirling down her face.

As a pool of something bitter collected in Kate’s stomach. Like a poison.

She glanced at Alices hands that wouldn’t stop shaking.

2\. Alice never took her gloves off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If u want me to write anything about Alice, just comment and I’ll see what I can do! Hopefully the last chapter can be up by tomorrow!


	3. Little things could set her off into uncontrollable shaking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kate and Alice find themselves trapped in a room. 
> 
> Filled with oxygen tanks.
> 
> Things can only go well from their right?
> 
> Ha.
> 
> Read so yourself

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!!! Thank you so much for reading this and giving kudos and commenting.
> 
> I appreciated every single one.

Little things could set her off into uncontrollable shaking.

This was something Kate had already picked up on. But she’d never understood on the full extent of it.

She had seen Alice have shaking spells before. But she had seen them enough and thought she had a grasp on what to do when they happened. Easy, take whatever object out of her hands if their was one, and leave her alone. Alice would deal with this on her own.

Easy enough right?

She couldn’t have been ANY more wrong if she’d jumped on a table and told everyone she was Straight.

“Where in the world are we?” Kate voiced. Confusion seeping through. It was true , in their Quest for Mouse, they both had fallen through a trap door and were now in a dark room filled with canisters of who knows what.

“Don’t you mean Who in the world am I? Ah that’s the great puzzle!” Alice stated melodically. From where she sat on a rickety metal table. Feet swinging back in forth in almost a childish manner, but upon seeing her maniacal eyes, the thought was quickly repelled away.

She kept circling and encircling her prized Butterfly knife. The ratcheting of the metal being the only noise currently Alive.

“Ugh!” Kate groaned, dropping her head into her hands, pinching the bridge of her nose.

“Don’t you ever talk normal?!” She questioned harshly. Annoyance quite evident in her demeanor.

Alice looked like Kate had just randomly stated she was a Shakespeare lover, bursting out laughing.   
That creepy delusional one that Kate hated.

“Have I gone mad?” She questioned, a wide smile upon her face, “I'm afraid so!” 

“But I will tell you a secret, Kate,” she spoke leaning in close as if to whisper, “All the best people are!”

Leaning back once again, she started to cackle, as if a broken record.

“Ugh! ALICE! I swear if you did more then repeat rhymes, then we actually might have a chance of getting out of here!” Kate chastised.

Alice opened her mouth to speak

“I SWEAR!” Kate interrupted ,”IF THE NEXT THING OUT OF YOUR MOUTH IS SOME SORT OF ALICE LIMERICK, I will find a copy just to SHOVE down your throat!” 

Alice just smiled and mock hid behind her gloved hands.

“Why don’t you do something useful? Are you a leader of a crime gang??? What do you do in these situations?” Kate questioned

Alice quirked her head to the side, 

“Alice was beginning to get very tired of sitting by her sister on the bank, and of having nothing to do.” She replied instead.

“Then do SOMETHING!” Kate struggled to calm herself.

Alice practically purred are the madness she was bringing her sister, Swinging the butterfly knife faster and faster.

“Shouldn’t you care about rescuing mouse?! All your doing is speaking in riddles? We have to get out of here, I don’t think-“

“THEN you shouldn’t TALK!” Alice spit out fiercely. Kate looked up to realize how mad the girl had gotten in the last few seconds. Her jaw was clasped firmly, and her cheeks reddened slightly.   
Her knuckles were even whiter from her grip on the butterfly knife.

Clearly Kate had hit a nerve.

“I um. Sorry, uh. It was stupid of me to say that.” Kate awkwardly retreated.

“Yeah it was!” Alice pouted like a moody 13 year old. Arms crossed in defiance.

Kate pondered this for a moment, technically, Alice kinda still had a mentality of a 13 year old girl? Which would explain so much of her behaviors.

It was amusing and horrifying at the same time. 

The lesbian laughed,   
that’s probably what Alice would describe herself as.

“Don’t fight the doors you are led too, take a deep breath, and go through.” Alice chirped from where she seemed to be sharpening her nails?

“What are you saying now?” The brown haired girl asked tentatively.

Alices eyes swiveled up until they met Kate’s. She then flicked them to a wall.

“Theirs a door, Kate. Blocked by oxygen? Take a deep breath. And go through!” 

Kate followed her gaze to a wall, layered with an extra amount of Canisters, to find they weren’t canisters, but Oxygen tanks. And they were blocking a Door.

Wow, Alice was ironic, and Spot on.

“Well, that’s um good. Hopefully that leads out of here.” She mumbled. Nodding her head.

Alice just squeaked and started laughing to herself.

Kate walked over and grabbed the first one, lugging it out of the way. It was heavier then expected, but doable.

She then spotted a moving dolly, tucked in the corner behind a shelf.

“Well that’s convenient.” She stated drily. Swiping her hand through her hair to get it to stand up straight once again, she grabbed the Contraption and loaded one on their, and it worked fine, causing the canisters to move with ease.

They clunked loudly as she slowly made progress to the door. She was aware of the Butterfly knife swinging coming to a still. And assumed Alice was watching her.

“Ya know if you got up and helped me, this would go twice as fast.” She commented with a twinge in annoyance.

“Nonononono.” She heard the voice behind her mumble.

“It’s just a few cans? What? Do you usually have your henchmen do this for you- ALICE!” 

Kate had finally turned around to find her sister a ghostly white.

The hand that clutched the knife was shaking so badly that Kate could feel the trembling from where she stood. 

Actually, her entire body was vibrating. As she shook her head violently, trying to snap out of whatever she was seeing.

Finally her hands shook so much, that she dropped the knife, Alices gaze snapped to her left as the knife hit the table. Bringing her hands in front of her with a horror filled gaze.

“W-what’s H-happening to me kate!” She shrieked.

When she looked back up, she screamed. Causing Kate to Wince, the blonde Vaulted backwards, rolling off the table and hiding behind it.

Kate ran around and took in her sister, curled into a ball, her back against the cabinets the table provided.

She kept shaking her head, holding her twitching hands to her chest.

“Nononono the Queens not supposed to arrive till later.” She mumble shakily. Her entire body positively vibrating.

The queen. The queen of hearts, that’s what Alice called Cartwrites mom?

...the oxygen tanks.

Ugh! Kate cursed herself. How could she be so stupid??? Mabel Cartwrite was known for Lugging a Tank of Oxygen around.

“Alice! Alice it’s me. It’s Kate.” She immediately stated, holding her hands out in front of her cautiously.

“Nononono, The queen drinks her tea until noon, she doesn’t come down unless she’s once to play croquet. I don’t want to play! I don’t want to play!” Alice spoke to herself, seemingly having a conversation.

Kate kneeled in front of her, grabbing her trembling gloves hands in her own.

“Alice. The Queen is gone.” She stated. Thinking about any wonderland quotes she could possibly infuse, a way to talk to her.

“She was too mean, so Off with her head?” She tried. Her nose wrinkling slightly.

Alice jerked her head, peering around the corner, once she saw the first oxygen tank, she recoiled. Shivering into a tiny ball, falling onto her side and rocking back and forth.

It took Kate a minute to figure out she was muttering under her breath, leaning down, she was able to make out form her pale lips.

“I’m sorry your majesty, I’m sorry your majesty. I don’t want to play croquet, I’m sorry your majesty.” 

And then it repeated.

Kate shuffled around, and crossed her legs underneath her, grunting slightly, she pulled Alice onto her lap, one hand grabbing another, and the later running over her colored hair.

“She’s not here Alice. The queen is dead. It’s only me. Just me and you.” She continued. Rocking back and forth soothingly.

Alice continued to whimper, obviously on the verge of tears.

“Ka-te.” She whispered meekly. 

Kate swept a hand over her forehead, leaning down and pressing a kiss to her temple.

“I’m here. I’m not leaving you.” She cooed.

Alice nodded, and finally hot tears cascaded down her ghostly pale skin.

“Where’s the Queen? Where’s the queen!” She gasped out in between sobs.

“The queen is gone Alice. The queen is gone.” Kate continued to comfort. Resuming all the original movements.

Alice just moaned in reply, griping Kate’s hand like a lifeline. She rolled in agony, trying to blink away the hallucinations from her eyes.

“I need to know!” She coughed out. Kate leaned in close to hear.

“I need to know the room.” She managed to say, rubbing her eyes.

“Oh uh! Of course,” Kate rushed eyes taking in the small room around them ,”your leaning on a auburn cabinet, the top was grey and rickety, where in a 20 by 25 feet room. The walls are a dull cream, their is a shelf behind the cabinet. The wall to the right of us has a white door, in front of the door is about 30 cans of oxygen. The ceiling is also grey.” Kate monologued.

Alice nodded. Over and over again.

“Burn table, grey walls, prison ceiling, Queens quarters.” She mumbled to herself. Kate didn’t even bother to be confused. Just let it happened.

Eventually Alice released her tense muscles, Collapsing in Kate’s embrace. 

“I’m so very tired of being Alone.” She croaked out. Squinting her eyes shut. 

Kate gave Alice a squeeze.

“Well then get some rest, for Alice now has her sister with her.” She remarked, (in a exceptional wonderland way, if she says so herself)

A small smile spread across Alices previously distraught face. She chuckled lightly.

“The Queen was wrong.” She murmured.

Somehow, Kate understood what she meant in that moment.

“The Queen was always wrong.” She confirmed. The laughs fell away from The blondes lips. And she turned and nuzzled Kate’s abdomen slightly.

“Alice thanks the card who was so brave to stand up to the queen.” The psychopath whispered softly.

Kate couldn’t help but break into a smile.

“Anytime.”

While their was definitely more, Kate knew one final thing that would go on her list.

3\. Little things could set her off into uncontrollable shaking.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If u guys Want more Alice centric fanfics please tell me!!! I will write all your prompts! 
> 
> EXCEPT smut.
> 
> I don’t do that
> 
> Got it
> 
> Good.
> 
> Thanks again for reading this!!!
> 
> Much love!, -   
>  an interesting little psychopath

**Author's Note:**

> Hope u liked all the Alice angst
> 
> Much love ❤️


End file.
